Killing your television is frequently touted as the answer to whatever ails your offspring, whether it's emotional distance, low grades, weight gain, or behavioral issues. But making it impossible for the members of your household to line up on the couch regularly to stare blankly in unison—or worse yet, alone from their individual beds—at a TV screen for hours on end doesn't necessarily guarantee lasting familial togetherness. No, to stay together, you've got to play together at something that involves eye contact and some kind of emotional exchange. (In other words, playing Sega together or going shopping doesn't count.) That's relatively easy with babies and young children. After all, you can engage the very young simply by coming back in the door and shouting "Peekaboo!" and interact with the pre- or school-age child by reading together or working finger paints or clay or Legos at the kitchen table. But finding things to do with your kids becomes increasingly challenging as they grow up, since they're more than likely to find the very notion of hanging out with the family as unappealing as it is embarrassing. Face it—in all likelihood, the last thing they want  as they hit the double digits in age is for you to come up with things to do that will keep them close to home. And yet, finding hip, inventive ways to spend time together as your kids get older might just be the most important thing you ever do as a parent. After all, as I keep reminding myself about my own 11-year-old and 14-year-old, before I know it, they'll be gone—and the less actively I seek their interaction, the fewer memories we'll all have of their childhood and the weaker the base they'll have from which to spring forth into this increasingly complex and difficult world.

Although our family always eats meals together, and indulging in more than an hour at a time of electronic activities (which essentially involves ignoring everyone else) has traditionally been verboten, I have to admit that when we moved recently I got a bit slack about certain rules and routines. Whenever things got quiet at home, rather than check to see why, I sprang into action, unpacking or working on the house or completing another freelance assignment at my computer, always feeling grateful for the chance to get one more job done. But then, as the boxes and to-do lists and deadlines cleared, I realized that something had been lost—namely, family life. Plus, the boys couldn't possibly have as much homework to do in their rooms at their computers as they were letting me assume.

So lately, I've been rethinking how to spend the free time I have with my kids. Going up against what turned out to be their newfound Runescape obsession—and instant messaging habits—neither of which I find problematic in short doses—has not been easy, but the one-hour rule has at last prevailed in the name of us being a family. And in my online searches and talking with friends who are fellow parents, I've discovered that I'm not alone in wanting not only to curtail solitary and passive activities, but to enrich our life together too. There's a zeitgeist occurring in regard to improving family time—check out www.BlueSuitMom.com, for instance, as just one example of the many Web sites devoted to enlivening family interaction. Although most folks I know and most Web sites I've visited are concerned with finding ways to interact meaningfully with toddlers or elementary school aged kids, between those resources and my own intuition, I've managed to relearn how to relate to my kids as they move toward adulthood in ways that are not only culturally enriching and promise to serve well down the track, but which, so far, they seem to consider cool rather than torturous.

Game Nights
As anyone who spent time shopping last holiday season knows, games of all kinds—card, board, and gambling—are in, and there's one for every sort of evening. We've designated Fridays as pizza and game night. For a really loud, raucous evening, we like Pit, a card game based on the "pits" of the commodities exchange, which requires a lot of shouting and bell ringing to "corner" the market. The more intellectual Cranium (available in various levels) is a good game for stimulating conversation; while backgammon, chess, and my personal childhood favorite, Othello, can be meditative. Classic games for kids and adults—from Chinese checkers to poker—are being marketed in new and very appealing ways. Our Texas Hold 'Em Poker Set, for instance, came in a tin box shaped like the several stacks of plastic poker chips contained within it; and whatever your personal interests, there's a Monopoly game designed just for you. (We like our Yankees and Star Wars versions as much as our original—and therefore, now retro-style—version.) Aside from the obvious lessons in sportsmanship and patience to be gained from playing just about any game, games allow family members to relax and reveal aspects of themselves that are perhaps not ordinarily seen. (Think of the complex characterizations of the mah jong players in Amy Tan's The Joy Luck Club.) "Everybody plays differently," I used to tell my younger son when he protested his brother's penchant for communal Monopoly deals. And these days, I'm as happy to host poker games on Friday nights as my kids are. But any game allows us to face each other, simultaneously goof off and get serious, and bring friends of all ages to the table with us.

Exposure, Exposure, Exposure
It's still fairly uncommon to take kids to an art museum, perhaps because there's always the danger of kids making noise, running through spaces, and touching artwork. But if you want to raise culturally cognizant kids, you have to let them experience art right from the start—and although MoMA, the Guggenheim, and the Metropolitan Museum of Art eventually become de rigueur, you don't necessarily need to go to New York City to do it. Dia: Beacon, Frances Lehman Loeb Gallery at Vassar College, Olana, SUNY New Paltz's Samuel Dorsky Gallery, and Albany's New York State Museum are all within an hour's drive of just about any point within the Hudson Valley.

When looking at art with kids, remember that, regardless of their age, they learn best through their senses. Try playing I Spy when visiting an art gallery with very young children, suggests www.BlueSuitMom.com. For elementary-school-aged children, try telling stories about what's going on in a particular painting, or bring along paper and pencils for the kids to make sketches of painted portraits. Or attempt the fifth grade painting project traditionally undertaken by art classes at Lenape Elementary School in New Paltz: choose any portrait, make a sketch of it, and let the child place himself or herself within it. Think: your daughter as Girl with a Pearl Earring or your son as Van Gogh.

Never Give Up on Storytime
I'll forever miss the days when I read every night to my boys, and I'll never give up their boxfuls of favorite picture books (except perhaps to my grandchildren), but recently, I realized, just because my kids have outgrown children's stories doesn't mean we have to give up reading together. Older kids, I happily discovered as we drove someplace one day, listening to short stories being read aloud on NPR, still like to be read to. Last summer during hot nights at home, in the face of complaints of boredom, I started to read short stories aloud: Hemingway, Poe, Faulkner, O'Connor, even Rick Moody. The room grew so quiet as I read for the first time that I suspected my listeners had fallen asleep, but when I stopped, they raised their heads from the sofa arms and asked me to keep going. Granted, reading "The Pit and the Pendulum" or "The Short, Happy Life of Francis MacComber" isn't the same as reading Where the Wild Things Are. But like films, there are so many classic stories I don't think we'll ever run out of material for reading aloud.