If you're hesitating about a relationship commitment, I would remind you that there is no rush. You may sense that you're heading for deep water, or like you're gradually being drawn into a situation that you don't fully understand. When you are ready, this may be fully appropriate. Yet if you're uncertain of yourself, slow down and observe your environment. The first thing to listen to is your intuition. If you suspect that you're not being given full information, or if you have a hunch that you're in any way being deceived, then pause and begin to look more deeply into the facts. You don't need to do this in an accusatory way, but rather in a way that seeks grounding in objective information. Consciously seek the truth, and make sure that you actually understand what you learn. Address any denial factor that may be present; be mindful of what you "don't want to know" or "refuse to believe." This process will take a bit of scrupulous honesty with yourself, though there may be clues that get you closer to the heart of the matter. I suggest you investigate with extra care any situation involving alcohol, or the influence of mood-altering drugs, be they prescription or otherwise. The question to ask is: how is this influencing your relationship to reality? How is it influencing intimacy? You want to know.
